Out and about yesterday--We traveled down to Lafayette, La to the Sertoma Air Show featuring the USAF Thunderbirds and benefiting autism research. We had so much fun touring the airplanes, helicopters and of course watching the air show. As always, they put on a wonderful show!!
Monday, November 3
Friday, September 5
~~Hurricane in Pictures~~
We are trying to get back to a sense of normalcy after 4 days of hurricane and subsequent aftermath. Here are some pics taken over the course of this week. Head over to Candid Carrie for more great pictures in the Friday Photo Finish Fiesta.
~Oscar is not amused with the heat, rain and wind of Hurricane Gustav~
~I started reading the 1st book in the Twilight series~
~Registering with The Weather Channel.com kept us updated of all warnings~
~Walmart meat area completely emptied after power outages~
~More empty Walmart shelves~
~Lots of trees down and flooding~
~Fans were a life-saver; we had 3 going at a time in the living room on generator power~
~Canned goods, YUM?, not~
~Small 13 inch TV kept us informed of weather alerts; only 1 channel~
~Small DVD player kept Trace occupied; he watched many movies this week~
~Oscar is not amused with the heat, rain and wind of Hurricane Gustav~
~I started reading the 1st book in the Twilight series~
~Registering with The Weather Channel.com kept us updated of all warnings~
~Walmart meat area completely emptied after power outages~
~More empty Walmart shelves~
~Lots of trees down and flooding~
~Fans were a life-saver; we had 3 going at a time in the living room on generator power~
~Canned goods, YUM?, not~
~Small 13 inch TV kept us informed of weather alerts; only 1 channel~
~Small DVD player kept Trace occupied; he watched many movies this week~
Wednesday, August 6
16 yrs ago my life changed forever.........
On August 6, 1992, my world came to a crashing, devastating, take your breath away halt. I checked in for my c-section for the birth of my second child on the evening of my birthday. After getting me admitted to my room, the nurse began to check for the baby's heartbeat with the doppler.
Complete silence filled the room............
......and we knew she had walked out of our lives forever............
Not a sound was heard from that little machine. The look in the nurse's eyes was heart-breaking as she called out for the ultrasound machine and my OB-GYN immediately. My 2nd daughter was born still early the next morning on August 7, 1992 at 9:01 am and we buried her at 2pm on August 9, 1992.
Nothing in life prepared me for the loss of my baby. Not only did I lose part of myself, I lost a part of my future; both parts that I will never ever get back and that I still mourn for daily. The feelings I went through and the thoughts I had can not ever be explained or written down. Even today, I have days of complete happiness and days of complete dispair.
The anniversary of her death and the holidays are the worse of all. The pain is just as raw today as it was that week. I always feel that there is someone missing, someone who is late to the party. Learning how to cope, go on, recover and how to be happy again takes the longest. I formed connections to songs, items, etc that seemed to help me understand.
The one thing that I found to be the most comforting was the song "The Dance" by Garth Brooks. His lyrics say: "I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance". That says to me that I could have missed the pain of losing my daughter, but I would have also had to miss the dance of carrying her throughout the pregnancy, feeling her kicks, seeing her on ultrasounds and holding her in my arms. That dance taught me so much about love, loss, recovery and perseverance.
Another item that seemed to come out of nowhere, but somehow had a significant meaning was "rabbits". While I was in the hospital, my parents were taking care of all the arrangements for the funeral. There was a small children's boutique clothing store in our little town that was scheduled to open for the first time that next week. My mother called the owners to see if they would open that weekend before so she could get a dress for her grand-daughters funeral. They graciously opened up so she could go pick out a dress to bury her baby's baby in. I can only imagine the pain she was also going through, especially having to do that task. She will never no how much she comforted me and helped me heal. She came back with a beautiful little white dress with rabbits on them. Little did she know, we had also picked up a small stuffed rabbit a couple of days before and it was sitting in the crib. So, Kristen was buried in her little bunny dress and her little stuffed bunny. Oh...and we have lots of bunnies in the back yard.
Kristen Paige would be turning 16 years old today.
I often wonder:
Would she be just as smart and beautiful as her sisters?
Would she be quiet, but outspoken and stand up for what she believes in like her sister Katie??
Would she be silly and tomboy-ish like her sister Kelsi??
Would she like to get down and dirty like her brother Trace??
Would she like to do crafts, scrapbook and cook like I do??
Would she be strong and goal oriented like her dad??
Would she be quiet, a hard worker, and giving like her grandfather?
Would she be loving, nurturing and sweet like her grandmother?
Would she love dogs, outdoors and gardening like we all do?
What would she want to be when she grows up?
Would she hate green beans and tomatoes like Katie?
Would she love being the center of attention like Kelsi or hate it like Katie?
Would she like lots of fruits unlike her brother Trace who only eats bananas?
Would she like lots of different styles of music like Kelsi and I?
Would she also love Disney like we all do?
Would she love to travel and develop a love for the "wild west" like her grandparents?
Would she have wanted a large "look at me" wedding like Kelsi, or a small personal "get married on the beach" wedding like Katie?
Would she love Elvis and classic rock like her grandmother and her dad?
Would she be a computer geek like her uncle Eric, her cousin Austin and her grandfather?
Would she be like to bake like her Aunt Anissa?
Would she love Sponge-Bob like her brother Trace and her cousin Aden?
Would she love Hannah Montana like her cousin Ariel or Miley Cyrus like her sister Kelsi?
Would she have a sense of adventure and drive for success like her uncle Luke?
Does she miss us as much as we miss her??
All of these questions and wonderings will never be answered. I can only dream and imagine how her life would have been.
I take extreme comfort in thinking that she is being rocked and held by my wonderful grandparents and family who had passed before her and those who have passed since.
I know my Nanny and my Maw are showing her the love and nurturing that only a grandmother can. Teaching her how to be a good listener, how to be patient, understanding and demand respect. I see Maw teaching her how to cook chicken and dumplings and make sweet potato pies. And I see Nanny teaching her some south Louisiana Cajun French--even the bad words like she taught me. They both also had a funny streak, so I know they are teaching her how to laugh and find humor in everything.
And I know my paw paw and my paw are teaching her meaning of unconditional love, how to be strong and weather the storms, how to hold her head up and stand up for her beliefs. I see Paw teaching her how to garden, fish and love the outdoors. And I see Paw Paw teaching her how to be strong, how to support and defend her country and step up and unconditionally love and support your children no matter what.
I also know that both my Uncle Jacks are showing her the beauty in music and in seeing beauty in everything through a camera lens. And my cousin Cindy is rocking her and telling all the stories of her many cousins and of the family reunions back home in Louisiana. I know my Aunt Gladys is loving on her the most--I always felt she completely understood the pain of losing my daughter since she had lost her own little boy. So, I know she is telling Kristen all the stories about me growing up, how wonderful her family is and how much we miss her.
All these things that I and her father was supposed to do. I was angry for a long time that this was taken away from me, but God had other plans, and I couldn't have had better grandparents, aunts, uncles and a cousin to do those jobs for me until we meet again.
Everyone dreams of angels, but I held one in my arms.
Complete silence filled the room............
......and we knew she had walked out of our lives forever............
Not a sound was heard from that little machine. The look in the nurse's eyes was heart-breaking as she called out for the ultrasound machine and my OB-GYN immediately. My 2nd daughter was born still early the next morning on August 7, 1992 at 9:01 am and we buried her at 2pm on August 9, 1992.
Nothing in life prepared me for the loss of my baby. Not only did I lose part of myself, I lost a part of my future; both parts that I will never ever get back and that I still mourn for daily. The feelings I went through and the thoughts I had can not ever be explained or written down. Even today, I have days of complete happiness and days of complete dispair.
The anniversary of her death and the holidays are the worse of all. The pain is just as raw today as it was that week. I always feel that there is someone missing, someone who is late to the party. Learning how to cope, go on, recover and how to be happy again takes the longest. I formed connections to songs, items, etc that seemed to help me understand.
The one thing that I found to be the most comforting was the song "The Dance" by Garth Brooks. His lyrics say: "I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance". That says to me that I could have missed the pain of losing my daughter, but I would have also had to miss the dance of carrying her throughout the pregnancy, feeling her kicks, seeing her on ultrasounds and holding her in my arms. That dance taught me so much about love, loss, recovery and perseverance.
Another item that seemed to come out of nowhere, but somehow had a significant meaning was "rabbits". While I was in the hospital, my parents were taking care of all the arrangements for the funeral. There was a small children's boutique clothing store in our little town that was scheduled to open for the first time that next week. My mother called the owners to see if they would open that weekend before so she could get a dress for her grand-daughters funeral. They graciously opened up so she could go pick out a dress to bury her baby's baby in. I can only imagine the pain she was also going through, especially having to do that task. She will never no how much she comforted me and helped me heal. She came back with a beautiful little white dress with rabbits on them. Little did she know, we had also picked up a small stuffed rabbit a couple of days before and it was sitting in the crib. So, Kristen was buried in her little bunny dress and her little stuffed bunny. Oh...and we have lots of bunnies in the back yard.
Kristen Paige would be turning 16 years old today.
I often wonder:
Would she be just as smart and beautiful as her sisters?
Would she be quiet, but outspoken and stand up for what she believes in like her sister Katie??
Would she be silly and tomboy-ish like her sister Kelsi??
Would she like to get down and dirty like her brother Trace??
Would she like to do crafts, scrapbook and cook like I do??
Would she be strong and goal oriented like her dad??
Would she be quiet, a hard worker, and giving like her grandfather?
Would she be loving, nurturing and sweet like her grandmother?
Would she love dogs, outdoors and gardening like we all do?
What would she want to be when she grows up?
Would she hate green beans and tomatoes like Katie?
Would she love being the center of attention like Kelsi or hate it like Katie?
Would she like lots of fruits unlike her brother Trace who only eats bananas?
Would she like lots of different styles of music like Kelsi and I?
Would she also love Disney like we all do?
Would she love to travel and develop a love for the "wild west" like her grandparents?
Would she have wanted a large "look at me" wedding like Kelsi, or a small personal "get married on the beach" wedding like Katie?
Would she love Elvis and classic rock like her grandmother and her dad?
Would she be a computer geek like her uncle Eric, her cousin Austin and her grandfather?
Would she be like to bake like her Aunt Anissa?
Would she love Sponge-Bob like her brother Trace and her cousin Aden?
Would she love Hannah Montana like her cousin Ariel or Miley Cyrus like her sister Kelsi?
Would she have a sense of adventure and drive for success like her uncle Luke?
Does she miss us as much as we miss her??
All of these questions and wonderings will never be answered. I can only dream and imagine how her life would have been.
I take extreme comfort in thinking that she is being rocked and held by my wonderful grandparents and family who had passed before her and those who have passed since.
I know my Nanny and my Maw are showing her the love and nurturing that only a grandmother can. Teaching her how to be a good listener, how to be patient, understanding and demand respect. I see Maw teaching her how to cook chicken and dumplings and make sweet potato pies. And I see Nanny teaching her some south Louisiana Cajun French--even the bad words like she taught me. They both also had a funny streak, so I know they are teaching her how to laugh and find humor in everything.
And I know my paw paw and my paw are teaching her meaning of unconditional love, how to be strong and weather the storms, how to hold her head up and stand up for her beliefs. I see Paw teaching her how to garden, fish and love the outdoors. And I see Paw Paw teaching her how to be strong, how to support and defend her country and step up and unconditionally love and support your children no matter what.
I also know that both my Uncle Jacks are showing her the beauty in music and in seeing beauty in everything through a camera lens. And my cousin Cindy is rocking her and telling all the stories of her many cousins and of the family reunions back home in Louisiana. I know my Aunt Gladys is loving on her the most--I always felt she completely understood the pain of losing my daughter since she had lost her own little boy. So, I know she is telling Kristen all the stories about me growing up, how wonderful her family is and how much we miss her.
All these things that I and her father was supposed to do. I was angry for a long time that this was taken away from me, but God had other plans, and I couldn't have had better grandparents, aunts, uncles and a cousin to do those jobs for me until we meet again.
Everyone dreams of angels, but I held one in my arms.
Wednesday, June 4
3 days post WDW vacation and this is what I hear...
UGH!! It's going to be a long summer!!! So.......... I go digging through all my stuff(junk) and find some yarn, crochet needles, and instruction book. YEAH!! I can teach Kelsi how to crochet.......or not?? I think this child has 2 left hands--LOL. I had to stand behind her and help her hold the yarn and needle to get going. Once she got it, she made her 1st chain and was quite proud of it.
Saturday, May 31
Memories of our Disney Vacation!!
We spent 8 wonderful days in Orlando, Fl at Walt Disney World last week. Weather was perfect, with temps in the 80s and a few rain showers. Crowds were very light at the beginning of the vacation and got steadily heavier as we approached Memorial Day. We went to the Magic Kingdom on Thursday May 22 and were able to walk on most of the rides. Almost all the rides had waits of 10 min or less. It was great!! It was overcast with very few light showers so I guess most stayed away from the parks. On Friday, May 23, there was a severe thunderstorm in the area and the Lights, Motors, Action car show that we were waiting to see was cancelled. We were still able to ride what we wanted with minimal waits. Saturday, we went to Animal Kingdom, and as soon as we got off the tram to go through the entrance, the bottom fell out and we were soaked. We walked as fast as we could to the Festival of the Lion King show to get out of the rain for a while, and when we came out, the sun was shining and it got humid. We got fast passes for Dinosaur and someone gave us fastpasses for the Safari. On Sunday, we went to Epcot, with I think half a million other people!!! My God, it was crowded, with waits for Soarin up to 90min and Test Track 70 min. We decided to go and walk around the "world" and enjoyed snacking on desserts throughout the different countries. We later checked back on wait times--which remained high--so we left and decided to go back another day. Monday was the Pirate and Princess Party at Magic Kingdom--which was wonderful--walked on all rides--no waits!! We rode and rode and rode. Tuesday, we went to Downtown Disney to shop and eat at House of Blues (got to have some Louisiana food), we then decided to go back to Epcot and try to ride the rides we had missed on Sunday. Soarin wait was only 60 minutes, so we got in line for that and rode--it is so much fun!! Even Trace enjoyed it. We then rode Mission Space--the green line and the orange line. WOW!! We got up on Wednesday and decided we had done all we wanted to do and headed back to Louisiana!! We had a wonderful relaxing time and can't wait to start planning the next WDW vacation--we will wait a few years though--this was the 3rd trip since 2001.
Monday, April 28
Out and About..... LSU Baseball Game
Stewart, Kelsi and Trace went to the LSU vs. South Carolina baseball game this past Saturday. They tail-gaited with hundreds of other fans despite the off and on rain showers. They left about 10:30 am and got back home about 11 pm. There were a few rain delays and the game went to 11 innings. They were very tired, sunburned, but had fun. They came home with some great LSU slouchy backpacks that the university gave away, a visor and a baseball (of which Kelsi got signed by a few of the players). These pictures were taken by Kelsi--
BTW--they did win the game--LSU 11 South Carolina 10
BTW--they did win the game--LSU 11 South Carolina 10
Thursday, April 24
Tuesday, April 22
Out and About...
This past Saturday we went to the Southern Forest Heritage Museum Festival in Longleaf, LA. We had never been to this festival which is part of the history in our small town. The festival focuses around the history of the forest industry in central Louisiana, how the original sawmills came about and then faded away into memory with the modernization of the United States.
Sunday, April 13
Out and About
We traveled down to Lake Charles yesterday to visit and spend time with Katie. It is her 20th birthday today but she has 4 tests this week, and she couldn't come home this weekend. So, we took home to her. ;)
We picked her up from college, enjoyed the alligators on the banks of the bayou, stopped at Raising Canes and then went down to the boardwalk along Calcasieu Lake to picnic. We had fun enjoying the lake breezes, feeding the seagulls and playing in the playground. There is a memorial dedicated to those who died in the twin towers and the Pentagon with actual beams from the towers and a limestone block from the Pentagon.
We got lost going back to the college and ended up down around the Port of Lake Charles. We had stopped on the road to enter the info in the GPS, when all of the sudden there was the Port Police asking up what we were doing and if we were taking pictures of the port. We weren't taking pictures of the port, but we did have 2 cameras and 4 camera phones, so I'm glad he didn't ask if we had cameras!! It was kind of scary but reassuring that Homeland Security is at work even in a small Louisiana port. I guess because it leads directly into the Gulf of Mexico.
It was a fun day and we were sad that she couldn't come home for her birthday, but proud that she takes her classes seriously and is making smart decisions. Happy Birthday Katie!!!
We picked her up from college, enjoyed the alligators on the banks of the bayou, stopped at Raising Canes and then went down to the boardwalk along Calcasieu Lake to picnic. We had fun enjoying the lake breezes, feeding the seagulls and playing in the playground. There is a memorial dedicated to those who died in the twin towers and the Pentagon with actual beams from the towers and a limestone block from the Pentagon.
We got lost going back to the college and ended up down around the Port of Lake Charles. We had stopped on the road to enter the info in the GPS, when all of the sudden there was the Port Police asking up what we were doing and if we were taking pictures of the port. We weren't taking pictures of the port, but we did have 2 cameras and 4 camera phones, so I'm glad he didn't ask if we had cameras!! It was kind of scary but reassuring that Homeland Security is at work even in a small Louisiana port. I guess because it leads directly into the Gulf of Mexico.
It was a fun day and we were sad that she couldn't come home for her birthday, but proud that she takes her classes seriously and is making smart decisions. Happy Birthday Katie!!!
Wednesday, April 2
Fun Spring Day
Kids got outside and enjoyed the cool Spring day. They played with play-doh for a while then decided to "wash" my truck.
Water+a mischievous little boy+screaming teenage girl=2 very wet kids and no washed truck.
Tuesday, April 1
Happy April Fool's Day!!
I was 1st to prank the kids today. I printed these and placed them on their doors. They got a kick out of them!! Maybe now they will clean their rooms??The paper reads "Caution! Do Not Enter!" The Dept of Health has been informed of a large thriving rodent community living in this room, due to the incredible mess therein and that the Rodent Recovery & Rescue Team has been deployed. All contents of this room has been confiscated and access to the room is denied--forever!!
I got the obligatory eyeroll and door slam!! ;) LOL
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